


The Death and Life of Todd Brotzman

by tonkshamsandwich



Category: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
Genre: Angst, Gen, Happy Ending, I cried while writing this, Inspired by Charlie St. Cloud, Pre-Relationship, ghost!amanda, ish, the charlie st clloud au noone asked for
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-08
Updated: 2017-07-08
Packaged: 2018-11-29 15:26:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,795
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11443707
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tonkshamsandwich/pseuds/tonkshamsandwich
Summary: When Amanda gets diagnosed with pararibulitis, Todd promised that he'd jam with her every sunset.When the worst happens, Todd intends to keep his promise. No matter how he feels about a certain holistic detective.(Or the one in which Amanda is a ghost, and that changes a lot of things. But not everything, because everything is still connected.)





	The Death and Life of Todd Brotzman

**Author's Note:**

> It's 1am, this is not beta read or anything. Please leave a comment telling me what you think, and pointing out any mistakes I may have made. ( I definetely have)

Todd and Amanda were pretty close as kids. Their mother used to be relieved, that Todd was always looking after Amanda and taking care of her. He never really pushed her aside or made her feel unwanted. Both of them were very musical and they would jam together a lot. When Amanda got diagnosed with pararibulitis, she nearly started crying, but Todd came in and told her that she was still his badass little sister, that just because her brain would sometimes be shitty it didn’t mean that she couldn’t be more that that. After all, their mother could live with it. (They both decided to ignore the fact that their mother was merely coping, surviving, and not _living_ per se).

 

“You promise you’ll look after me? And treat me just the same?” she asked him uncertainly the night before she was released from hospital.

 

“Of course,” Todd smiled down at her. “We’ll jam every night, just like we always do.”

 

“Every night?” she asked.

 

“Every night, when the sun goes down, us two? We will rock, no matter what! I promise you that. On our sacred oath of siblinghood.” he replied, holding out his fist for her to fistbump. And just like that, it was promised.

 

Todd and Amanda became closer than ever after that. Eventually, it was Amanda’s thirteenth birthday and Todd, who had been busy studying for important exams, nearly forgot it was her birthday. He realised halfway through the day, and instead tried to pretend to pretend to have forgotten because he had something awesome planned. Luckily he found a favourite band of hers playing in a nearby bar, and they both snuck out that night to go see them.

 

On the way back, Amanda was completely overexcited, rambling on and on about how awesome it was and how much she loved it. She turned up the radio halfway home and they started jamming out to the radio. Todd got so much into it and took his eyes off of the road for one second to glance over at Amanda headbanging joyously in the passenger seat.

 

One second was all it took.

 

The truck was coming up onto the motorway and slipped on the wet road and slid across, slamming into the car head on.

 

The next thing Todd knew, he was lying on his back, and there was a man leaning over him. “He’s awake!” he yelled.

 

“Amanda? Where’s – What’s happening? Where’s Amanda? Is she alright? _Where is she?”_ Todd asked, getting increasingly panicked at the lack of response. Turning his head, he could see her lying on a stretcher next to him. The paramedics were trying to revive her. Her neck was bent at an unnatural angle, her too-pale face facing him. Todd reached out his hand and grabbed onto hers, squeezing it as tight as he could. “Don’t you _dare_ leave me,” he told her fiercely, trying to speak through the knot in his chest that was telling him that she couldn’t hear him, would never hear him again. “Don’t you dare.”

 

The ambulance drove them both to the hospital, Todd holding Amanda’s hand all the way there, despite knowing that it made no difference.

 

 /|\/|\/|\

 

‘Whoever said that it always rained at funerals was wrong,’ thought Todd, feeling unnecessarily angry at the pale wintery sun that was shining down on the congregation. He scowled, thrusting his hands into his pockets and glaring around. He didn’t want to be here, burying his sister. His little sister, who should be standing here, laughing at the old people muttering platitudes, shoving Todd with her elbow while he whispered a rude running commentary into her ear.

 

All of a sudden, he couldn’t bear it anymore. Ignoring the shouts and the glares and his mother’s protest, he sprinted towards the forest, tears filling his eyes. He ran until he could run no more, then collapsed to his feet in a clearing. He couldn’t even cry, he just lay there, his heart too full of sorrow, of _guilt,_ to be expressed. He didn’t _deserve_ to cry over her death. It was all his fault. If he’d been a better brother, he would’ve remembered her birthday earlier and arranged a better birthday, or maybe if he’d paid better attention to the road, he could’ve avoided this all.

 

He lay there in the middle of the clearing curled up in a ball until the sun began to set, letting these thoughts and others pour through his mind. He was interrupted from his thoughts by an all-too familiar voice and a drumstick hitting him in the face.

 

“Hey asshole! Why’re you not crying?”

 

“Amanda?” he gasped, looking up and seeing her standing there at the edge of the clearing, holding her other drumstick in her hand, dressed in the slightly too big band shirt he had bought her at the gig, his old leather jacket over that.

 

“Duh. Who else would it be?” she grinned cheekily at him.

 

“Wha-wha- _how?”_ he sputtered out.

 

“You promised me you’d jam with me, every night. I’m not about to let death stop me from letting you out of that promise,” she smiled slightly wobbily at him.

 

“Every evening, as the sun sets,” Todd replied, still feeling overwhelmed, but deciding to roll with this. He wasn’t going to waste another chance to be with his sister.

 

“This I swear on the sacred oath of siblinghood.”

 

/|\/|\/|\ 

 

The years passed and Todd never forgot his promise. Every evening as the guns in the harbour fired out a salute, Todd would pack up, grab his guitar and head for the clearing in the woods. And every night, without fail, the two siblings would jam for around an hour before Amanda faded away into the trees.

 

Todd grew up and finished high school, even graduating with a full scholarship for music for two universities. However, as both of those universities were too far away for him to be able to be back in time to be with Amanda, he turned both of them down. Instead, he took up a job working as a maintenance worker in the graveyard where Amanda was buried. He spent his days in an ongoing war with the geese who kept trying to invade and eat all the grass, and his evenings in the forest with Amanda.

 

He also discovered that he could see other people who had died, and would talk to them when they woke up in the graveyard, confused and upset. Most of them moved on after a couple of days, once they’d said their goodbyes, or accepted that they were dead. Some of them stayed on longer, like old Mrs. Hannigan down the road, who insisted on staying until her husband joined her. Todd greeted her every morning on his way to do battle with the geese.

 

But other than that, that was his daily life. He didn’t really have many friends, as many found his habits of occasionally speaking to thin air disturbing, or how he always had to be home for sunset unsettling. Besides, working in a graveyard was creepy apparently.

 

Todd didn’t really mind much. He had Amanda, and he had the other colleagues who worked in the graveyard, and he had the boys who volunteered with him in the lifeboats. They knew that they could call on him any time after sunset and he would be there, or during the day, but if it was close to sunset they accepted that he had to be somewhere. Most people accepted that habit of his, many of the elder people still having sympathy for the “crazy boy who still hadn’t accepted his sister died”. So Todd spent most of his time alone.

 

Or at least, he did up until Dirk Gently quite literally fell into his life.

 

Todd had just gotten back from being with Amanda and was feeling tired and drained, and cold and wet. He just wanted to sleep, but he still had to eat something first. He slumped against the door, feeling the ache in his chest that always accompanied storms, and was mentally running through his larder when he was interrupted by a thudding noise.

 

He opened his eyes to spot someone wearing an eyewateringly bright yellow leather jacket and tight pants falling through his window.

 

“What the hell?” Todd screeched, before grabbing around for something to throw. He finally found an old shoe of his and threw it at the man just in time for him to straighten up. It hit him full in the face. Right on his nose, in fact. Todd felt strangely smug about that.

 

“Ow!” the man exclaimed, sounding hurt and indignant at the same time. “What the hell?”

 

“What the hell?” repeated Todd incredulously. “You what the hell! No, me what the hell?! What are you doing in my house?”

“I’m a holistic detective!” the man announced like that was supposed to be grand and impressive.

 

Todd stared at him flatly. “A what.”

 

“A holistic detective.”

 

“You repeating yourself doesn’t make it any clearer,” Todd noted, half amused despite himself.

 

The man brushed it off.  “I’m a holistic detective. It means I follow the will of the universe. I don’t trouble myself with nonsensical things such as fingerprints or dusting powder. I believe that everything is connected, and as such will merely solve whatever case I'm on by merely doing... whatever.” The man finished off his explanation with a flourish of his hands and a big grin.

 

“You’re a detective that doesn’t detect. That sounds, you know, insane.” Todd couldn’t help but point out. “Besides, what do I have to do with all this?”

 

Here the man looked a bit embarrassed. “Actually, nothing. I just needed some shelter and thought that this house was empty. But it wasn’t! So obviously the universe wanted me to meet you!” the man looked cheered up by this. “Ah-hah! Maybe you’re a clue. Or maybe you’re going to be my new assistant!”

 

“We don’t even know what we’re called,” Todd pointed out. “Also, you’re a crazy stranger who’s literally broken into my house. How can I trust you?”

 

“Let’s not reinvent the truth here.” He protested in reply. “I didn’t break in, I merely...fell through a convenient opening. Besides, my name’s Dirk Gently. Here’s a card.”

 

Todd reached out to take the card. Sighing, he decided to roll with it. It’s not like he could say much, he’d literally just returned from a jamming session with his dead sister.

 

“Ok, fine, you can stay the night. But first, you have to shower, then help me wash up after dinner, and you’re sleeping on the couch, I’m not giving up my bed.”

 

Dirk looked surprised and delighted, like it was a rare occasion that people let him stay. Todd tried to ignore the slight jab of pain in his heart that that realisation caused. Instead, he bustled past Dirk into the kitchen to start preparing dinner.

 

“And Dirk?” he called after him. “My name’s Todd. Todd Brotzmann.”

 

The bright smile he got in return for that caused Todd’s heart to skip a beat.

 

 /|\/|\/|\

 

The next morning, after enlisting Dirk’s help in scaring off the geese (a futile gesture, as they’d just be back later that afternoon), Todd sat down with Dirk in order to find out more about his current case.

 

“So anyways,” continues Dirk, “there I was, trying to get the horse out from behind the sofa, when my phone rings. And it’s an American number! So of course I answer it. And it’s this guy named Patrick Spring, who I later found out is a pretty big deal, and he hires me to solve his death. By animal attack! In advance! I mean, come on. How could I _not_ accept that case.”

 

Todd nods in agreement when he finds Dirk staring at him expectantly.

 

“So anyways, here I am, in America, trying to solve a millionaire’s murder!” he finished off.

 

“Any plans on where to go from here?” Todd asks.

 

Dirk looks a little crestfallen. “No, actually. I’d hoped you would,” he said.

 

Todd sighed, and (barely) restrained the urge to roll his eyes.

 

“Well, you said the universe brings you clues, yes? Then how about we just walk around the town, see if we spot anything unusual?”

 

“We?” asked Dirk.

 

“Yes?” replied Todd, suddenly unsure of himself. Had he overstepped some boundary of some sort?

 

His fears were unfounded, however, as Dirk once again blessed him with a beaming grin that caused Todd’s heart to skip a beat.  He scowled to himself, and told himself firmly that his heart was finally acting up, nothing else.

 

The two of them spent the rest of the day walking about, finding nothing more unusual than a stray dog running around. Dirk suggested that they bring the dog back to its owners, but Todd, seeing how close to sunset it was, suggested that Dirk bring it back himself as he was feeling rather tired. Dirk agreed, but looked forlorn at having to do it on his own. Todd felt bad about it, he really did, and almost wanted to say that he’d come, but Amanda came first.

 

Amanda always came first.

 

He owed it to her.

 

/|\/|\/|\ 

 

While he was with Amanda, Dirk called him. Todd excused himself from Amanda to go and answer it. He could feel Amanda’s curious gaze on his back.

 

“Hi Dirk, what’s up?” he asked, trying to sound tired. (Not that much of a stretch really.)

 

“You’ll never guess who I found at that house!” Dirk yelled excitedly.

 

“I don’t know. Who?” he replied.

 

“Lydia Spring!”

 

“What? Holy shit!” Todd exclaimed. “What’re you going to do? Are you gonna go to the cops?”

 

“What? No. Don’t be silly Todd. I'm going to be on stake out for the night and gather valuable intel! You can come join me tomorrow morning!”

 

“I don’t even know where you _are,_ Dirk.” Todd replied, pinching the bridge of his nose to stave off a headache.

 

Dirk quickly rattled off an address. Todd noted it, before saying goodbye and hanging up.

 

“Who was that?” Amanda asked.

 

“Dirk Gently.”

 

Amanda stared at him.

 

“He’s a... guy. A friend. I'm helping him with a ... thing.”

 

“Dude, do you have any idea how shady you sound right now? That’s awesome!”

 

Todd grinned at her, somehow relieved that she approved. “I don’t think shady activities are supposed to be awesome, sis.”

 

She grinned at him, unrepentant. “If it’s you we’re talking about, it totally is. You never do anything cool! You’re like, the lamest guy I know!”

 

Todd mock winced, acting like he’d been stabbed in the heart. He fell dramatically to the ground. He was rewarded with Amanda’s laugh, bright and innocent and happy. How could he ever not want this?

 

/|\/|\/|\ 

 

The next morning he went off to visit Dirk, after spending half an hour running around the graveyard chasing geese around with a large stick and making aggressive honking noises. When he arrived at the address, Dirk looked at him funny and then reached over and brushed a feather out of his hair. Todd caught himself holding his breath an tried to release it silently. Dammit, he was not getting a crush. He wasn’t!

 

He distracted himself by asking Dirk what he’d found out.

 

“Nothing really. I fell asleep around 4am, but he went to sleep around 2am, and woke up around 8am. Oh, and his name’s Gordon Rimmer.”

  
“How’d you know that?”

 

“I read the address on his mailbox.” Dirk answered matter-of-factly.

 

The two of them spent the morning watching the house. Rimmer left the house at around 1pm, so the two of them decided to sneak in. Or rather, Dirk decided to sneak in, and Todd had to follow him because he had Todd’s phone.

 

Inside, they discovered that Lydia was acting surprisingly weird, as was the dog they’d brought back before. Todd took charge at this point, and decided to bring the two of them to the police station.

 

Inside the police station, Todd handed off Lydia and the dog. While he was being questioned, they seemed confused by his mentioning of Dirk, but upon finding out who he was, they let him go. Outside he met Dirk, who appeared puzzled by something.

 

“Todd,” he began slowly. “I have a very strange feeling that Lydia is not who she appears to be.”

 

“Oh yeah?”

 

“Yes! Consider; Lydia the human, acting like a dog, and the dog, acting strangely intelligent. And the fact that Rimmer didn’t bother to tie up Lydia Spring. Ergo, vis a vis, I forward a theory. Lydia Spring is, in fact, inside of the dog!”

 

“...Right, of course,” Todd replied, sighing. Once more he decided to just go with it. after all they’d found Lydia by doing this. Maybe there was some merit to Dirk’s “holistic detective” thing after all.

 

“They’d need some sort of machine or magic wand or drug in order to do this,” Dirk continued excitedly. “To Rimmer’s house!”

 

“Whatever you say,” Todd said, smiling to himself.

 

Walking past him, a young black woman gave him a weird look and continued on.

 

Todd ignored it in favour of following after Dirk.

 

/|\/|\/|\ 

 

Todd whiled away the afternoon outside of Rimmer’s house. As it approached sunset, he set off for home, but not before making Dirk promise to call him before doing something stupid. Dirk look affronted, but promised anyway.

 

 Todd spent the entire jamming session with Amanda on edge, waiting for Dirk to call. After about forty minutes of this, Amanda stopped.

 

“Dude, what’s wrong? You’ve been on edge the entire night. Oh! Something’s up with that guy, isn’t it?”

 

“Yes. No. Maybe? I don’t know.” Todd sighed.

 

“Do you, like, have a crush on him?”

 

Todd blushed, but refused to answer.   


“Oh my God, you do, you totally do!” she crowed in delight. “Todd and Dirk, sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-“

 

“-Ok, that’s quite enough out of you young missus,” Todd interrupted her, before tickling her in her sides. It still worked, even though she wasn’t quite substantial. She shrieked in delight before running off. Todd chased her around the clearing, until Amanda suddenly stopped, facing him.

 

“...you’re not going to forget about me, are you?” she asked, voice small, eyes bright with tears.

 

Todd hurried over and gave her a hug. “No, no, no, of course not!” he reassured her. “I could never forget you, Amanda-Panda.” He finished using his childhood nickname for her.

 

“Dude! Not cool,” she mock-scowled, hitting his arm, but returned the hug. “Just promise me you’ll always be here.”

 

“When have I ever broken my promise?” he said.

 

/|\/|\/|\

 

Later that night, he got a call from Dirk.

 

“Todd! I have a lead! Meet by the bridge!” he blurted out then hung up. Todd sighed before rolling out of bed, grumbling the whole drive there.

 

When he arrived, he could see Dirk crouched down behind some bushes at the side of the bridge.

 

“Look at this,” said Dirk, thrusting his phone into Todd’s face. It was a text message saying ‘we have your friend. bring the dog. meet us at the bridge at midnight’ Attached was a picture of the woman that Todd had passed yesterday.

 

“Do you have the dog?” Todd asked.

 

“No!” replied Dirk. “We’re not going to show up. I’m  going to follow Rimmer when he leave, and you’re going to go rescue the woman!”

 

“Wait, hang on – Rimmer sent you this text? How did he get your number?”

 

“Oh, I dropped a bunch of cards at his place by accident when I was snooping in there for the thingie that changed Lydia into a dog and a dog into Lydia Spring.”

 

“And when was this?” Todd asked, eyebrow raised.

 

“Oh, earlier this evening, after you left. Where did you go, actually? You never said.”

 

“Hang on, didn’t you promise me you’d call me before doing something stupid?”

 

“Shush, they’re coming! We don’t have time to argue this now! Are you clear on the plan?”

 

“What plan?” Todd hissed, before being pulled down behind the bushes by Dirk.

 

Rimmer and another bald man got out of the car. Out of the corner of his eye, Todd could see Dirk sneak off into the darkness. Presumably to find a way to follow Rimmer and his henchman after Todd rescued Farah. How exactly was he going to do that anyway?

 

Todd decided to sneak a little closer, and could hear Rimmer talking on the phone to someone. He seemed to be arguing about someone named Rainey and the Supreme Soul. Todd decided to ignore it. Rimmer walked a bit out of distance, leaving the woman only guarded by the bald man.

 

Todd crept closer before stubbing his foot on a rock. Clenching his fists and screwing up his face, he tried desperately not to swear. Suddenly he hit upon an idea. Sneaking as close as he dared, he threw the rock past the henchman. He turned in that direction, but didn’t leave.

 

‘Damn!’ thought Todd. He glanced around for another rock. He found a big one, and hefting it, threw it into the water behind him and to the right. This time, the henchman looked confused and walked over to Rimmer.

 

Todd seized his chance. He ran over to the woman and quickly hissed, “This is your chance to escape. Come with me, quickly!” He grabbed the woman by the arm and led her to the end o the bridge, to where they were hidden by bushes. Here, he carefully unbuckled the weird helmet type thing that she was wearing on her head, and untied the knots tying her hand behind her back. He turned around to see what was happening on the bridge, and promptly got blindsided by the woman, who hit him around the head with the helmet. The last thing Todd saw was her apologetic face whispering “thanks.”

 

/|\/|\/|\ 

 

When Todd woke up the next morning, he had a killer headache, and twelve missed calls from Dirk. Sighing, he called Dirk back, hoping he hadn’t missed anything important. This thought caught him by surprise. It had been years since he had had any interest in anything except meeting Amanda at sunset. Before he had time to wrap his head around this idea, Dirk answered the phone.

 

“Todd! I found the machine! I also found the Men with the Machine, and travelled in time, and met Patrick Spring, who is also Edgar Spring, who is also Zachiarah Webb, the inventor-“

 

“Woah, woah, wait, slow down. You what? You time travelled? Start at the beginning!”

 

Dirk proceeded to launch into the weirdest tale Todd had ever heard, full of strange cults and time travelling inventors and weird machines and stuff. Dirk finished off by saying that he had solved the case and had only gotten minorly injured!

 

“And have you called the police?” Todd asked.

 

“Do you honestly think that they’ll believe this? I destroyed the machines, Todd. There’s no way they’ll ever be able to continue doing this. Oh! And I got Lydia swapped back too!”

 

Todd sighed and went to hang up, but thought better of it. “Hey, Dirk? Wanna come back to my place and celebrate that the case is over?”

 

“Really? I’d love to!” Dirk enthused.

 

The two of them ended up having a surprisingly good time. They talked about their pasts, Todd even told him about the car crash, and in return Dirk shared some experiences about being a Blackwing Operative and what that was like. They also talked about their hobbies and interests, and their opinions on a lot of things. In the end, Todd didn’t notice the time passing until he could hear the cannon shots signalling that it was time for sunset.

 

Todd panicked, made the flimsiest of excuses and shoved Dirk out the door, trying to ignore the hurt look on his face, grabbed his guitar and ran for the forest. By the time he arrived, he could tell he was late. Amanda was walking back into the trees.

 

“Amanda, wait!” he called desperately. “Wait, I'm sorry! I didn’t mean to- I lost track of time-I’m sorry.”

 

Amanda wheeled around. “You’re forgetting about me, Todd!” she yelled, tears streaming down her face. “I can feel it! Right here!” she pointed at her chest. Todd tried to protest but Amanda continued. “You’re forgetting about me because of that, that man!”

 

“No I'm not!” Todd yelled back, fear and guilt making his chest tight, because he _had_ forgotten.

 

“Oh yeah? Then why is _he_ here!”

 

Todd turned around. There, with a guilty, confused look on his face, was Dirk. Todd’s mouth dropped. “What are you _doing_ here Dirk?” exclaimed Todd.

 

“You were acting weird! I’m a detective! I followed you!” he said. Then he turned to Amanda and waved, saying “Hi, I'm Dirk Gently! Nice to meet you!”

 

Todd’s incredulous “You can see her?” was closely echoed by Amanda’s “You can see me?”

 

“Well, duh! She’s standing right there.” Dirk said, as if pointing out the obvious.

 

“But, how? I mean, she’s dead.” Todd said, then winced at how bluntly he said it.

 

“Ahh, then you must be Amanda!” said Dirk, holding out a hand for Amanda to shake. Amanda, looking perturbed, shook it, looking surprised when she could actually touch him.

 

“Dirk, how can you see – “ Todd started, before suddenly coming to a realisation. The weird looks that Todd got when he was in public with Dirk. The fact that the dog in Lydia Spring had ignored Dirk and only gone for Todd. The fact that Dirk didn’t get caught while he was in the past. _The fact that he could see Amanda._

 

It all lead up to one conclusion.

 

“Dirk, I think you’re dead.”

 

“What? That’s ridiculous! I’m completely alive. 100% living human being, that’s me!”

 

“No listen, Dirk – listen to me! You’re dead, or you’re dying, and your soul came to the one person who could help, the one person nearby who could possibly understand. You said it yourself! The universe wanted you to meet me! Only you haven’t! Not yet.”

 

Dirk had gone pale, pale as a ghost Todd thought to himself, before having to stifle a hysterical giggle. Todd forced himself to concentrate.

 

“Dirk, I need you to remember. Where are you? What’s happened? What’s the last thing you remember?” Todd urged Dirk earnestly.

 

Dirk frowned, concentrated, before going paler. A trail of blood started rolling down the side of his face, and he started to shiver uncontrollably. “Sail boat, east, red,” he said simply, before his eyes rolled into the back of his head and he fainted. He had disappeared before he hit the ground.

 

Todd started helplessly at where he had disappeared, before looking desperately at Amanda. “Amanda, I have to help him,” he whispered hoarsely, tears in his eyes.

 

She looked back at him, tears rolling down her face. She smiled at him though, through the tears. “I know,” she replied. “I know. Go on, go get your happy ending. You don’t need me anymore.” She let out a sob, then held out her arms for a hug. Todd leaned in and held her close for the last time. “Goodbye, Todd. I love you.”

 

“I love you too,” Todd replied, his voice cracking.

 

And then Amanda disappeared.

 

/|\/|\/|\ 

 

Todd waited in the clearing for a few minutes, trying to stop the tears, before he turned and sprinted into town. He ran into the bar, and spotted Martin, who was in charge of the volunteer life guard. Todd walked up to him and said “Martin, there’s someone out there in distress. They’re in a sail boat, east of here, and either the boat or the sail is red. Don’t ask me how I know, just please, will you help me?”

 

Martin stared at him over the rim of his glasses for a long moment, scrutinising Todd, before coming to a decision. “Boys!” he yelled over his shoulder. “We’ve got a call out!”

 

“Thank you so much,” Todd gasped out, finally feeling the effects of running all the way from the graveyard. He sat down suddenly, worn out, catching his breath, while Martin gathered up the others. He followed them down to the harbour, and told them what he knew. They piled into three lifeboats, Todd and Martin and Vogel on the biggest, Bart, Ken on one, and Gripps and Cross on the last one.

 

“Alright, boys,” Martin said over the radio. “Keep in contact, there’s a storm brewing out there. Radio in every twenty minutes, and keep a weather eye out. Radio in any sightings, or any course changes. Over.”

 

“Aye, aye, sir. Over” came the dual reply from the other two.

 

They sped out into the harbour, Vogel manning the radio for them, Martin driving, while Todd scanned the water for a sign of red. As it approached morning, Martin told them all to sleep in shifts of four hours so they could keep searching. It was approaching sunset again, when Vogel leaned over to Todd.

 

“Aren’t you normally doing something at this time?” he asked.

 

“This is more important,” replied Todd, keeping his eyes peeled on the horizon. Inside, however, he was counting down the minutes to sunset, counting down the minutes til he broke his promise to Amanda for the first time ever.

 

Sunset came and went, and Todd felt something inside of him break. “I'm sorry, Amanda,” he whispered into the evening breeze as he cuts across the waves. His words carried back across the water, over the town, through the graveyard and into the clearing where Amanda was standing there silently, drum sticks in her hands. She stood there silently for a while, before calling out. "Todd?"

 

She sat down on a stump and waited for her brother, even though she could feel that he wasn’t coming. She didn’t want to give up hope, didn’t want to give up on her brother, didn’t want to give up on life.

As the last of the sun's rays began to fade from the sky, she stood up and waved goodbye to her brother. With tears in her eyes she turned and began to walk away, feeling herself fade away as she did so. And then, suddenly, she feels _everything._

 

She feels her brothers grief and guilt and his determination to do right by someone for the first time in his life, and she feels Dirk cold and hurt and unconscious lying on the rocks just past where Todd will sail.

 

Without even consciously deciding to, she gives the last of her energy to speed across the harbour to show her brother the way.

 

Out on the water, Todd was startled from his thoughts by Vogel shouting "Hey look, a shooting star!" Todd looked up and _knew_ it was Amanda, knew she knew, knew that she understood and forgave him.

 

He followed her path with his eyes, and suddenly saw a patch of red on the water beside a clump of rocks. It was a sail. “Thank you Amanda,” he whispered under his breath, before yelling at the others. “Look! Over there!”

 

As they get closer, Todd could see Dirk’s boat lying sideways in the water, the red sail looking like blood on the water under the lamplight.

 

Todd checked the straps on his life-vest, took off his shoes and jumped into the water.

 

“What the hell do you think you’re doing Brotzmann?” he heard Martin yelling at him, but he was distracted by how cold the water is. Todd could barely breath, it was that cold.

 

Todd thought of Dirk’s bright grin, of Amanda’s sacrifice, and swam closer to the boat.

 

He dived through the boat, not finding any body, just flotsam milling about in the hull. ‘Thank God,’ he thought, ‘Dirk didn’t go down with the ship.’ He surfaced on the other side of the boat. In the distance he could faintly hear Martin swearing up a storm, and Vogel calmly calling in a distress call for two people.

 

“I haven’t found him yet, boys!” he yelled over at them. “I’m attempting to get on the island!”

 

That was easier said than done. Todd was freezing cold and couldn’t properly move his fingers and toes to grip anymore, the swell was getting larger with the storm that was coming, and the water made the sides of the rock slick and hard to climb. But Dirk had managed it, with a head injury no less, and he needed help. Todd _had_ to make it.

 

He waited until a particularly large wave came, and used its momentum to make it easier to get onto the rocks. Once on the rocks, it was marginally easier to navigate. Dirk was also easy to spot, he was wearing a lifejacket the same bright shade of yellow as his leather jacket.

 

 

Todd rushed over to him and checked on him. One small head injury, probably a concussion and cause of unconsciousness, check. Hypothermia, check. Small cuts on hands and knees and elbows but no other signs of injury, check.

 

Todd decided to leave the injuries alone for now, and focus on the one thing he could fix – the hypothermia. He took off all of Dirk’s wet clothes and life jacket, and did the same for himself, and then he lay as on top of Dirk as he could manage, trying to make sure that he was covering more of Dirk’s core than his limbs. There he waited, shivering and freezing, until the rescue helicopter came and lifted them both to safety.

 

/|\/|\/|\ 

 

Todd is released the next day after spending the night in the hospital getting thoroughly warmed up and checked on and rehydrated. He pops into Dirk’s room before he leaves, but he’s in a coma and won’t wake up for a while the doctors say.

 

That evening as the sun goes down he heads over to the clearing. As he expected Amanda isn’t there. With tears in his eyes, he finally says lets go of  her and begins to move on with his life.

 

Just before he leaves, he feels a breeze wrapping around him and he knows it’s her. It’s Amanda letting him know she’s ok, she moved on, and she’ll wait for him. He can finally move on.

 

It’s nearly a month later that Dirk wakes up from his coma. When he walks out the hospital after finally being released he expects to be alone again, like he always is.

 

But there’s a small man with dark hair and the brightest bluest eyes Dirks ever seen waiting there for him.

 

Dirk feels a faint sense of recognition.

 

The man smiles at him, and suddenly Dirk feels like the suns just come out after a long rainy day.

 

And he knows, everything's going to be alright.

 


End file.
